Baby It’s Cold Outside

Hello My Imaginary Friends,

The song Baby It’s Cold Outside is downright creepy in modern days. I’m going to give the song the benefit of the doubt and assume it was written as a cute flirty song for the Holidays.

Recently the signer and songwriter duo Lydia Liza and Josiah Lemanski re-wrote the song to be less creepy and all about consent. As much as I applaud their enthusiasm, as a tool to teach consent it’s great, but it’s both a little awkward and really pushy as a message. That pushiness losses the original cute flirty feel of the song.

cold

With small changes, the song can be fun without being creepy. The first thing to do is change who’s saying what. The structure of the song has a person who wants to leave and another who doesn’t want them to leave. It’s called a Mouse and Wolf Structure.

Switch the lines so that the Mouse is the Wolf and you suddenly have a much flirty-er song.

Original

Mouse: I really can’t stay
Wolf: Baby it’s cold outside
Mouse: I’ve got to go away
Wolf: Baby it’s cold out there
Mouse: This evening has been
Wolf: Been hoping that you’d drop in
Mouse: So very nice
Wolf: I’ll hold your hands, they’re just like ice

My Edit

Mouse: You really can’t stay
Wolf: Baby it’s cold outside
Mouse: You’ve got to go away
Wolf: Baby it’s cold out there
Mouse: This evening has been
Wolf: Been hoping that I’d drop in?
Mouse: So very nice
Wolf: I’ll hold your hands, they’re just like ice

It’s a little pushy but not as creepy since it comes off as the Wolf not wanting the leave and the Mouse teasing them about it. Lines like the below go from “I’m trying to escape” to teasing.

Original

Mouse: My mother will start to worry
Wolf: Beautiful, what’s your hurry?

My Edit

Mouse: Your mother will start to worry
Wolf: Beautiful, what’s your hurry?

Besides the slight reversal of roles I’d also add a line after, “What’s in this drink” that says, “Marshmallows, you’re driving.” and change Cigarettes to Episodes.

 

What do you think? Would this make the song fun again without feeling dirty or should we just retire this one as a holiday song?

Éric

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