Top 5 Rudest Questions I’ve Been Asked

Everyone knows that feeling; the awkward rude question feeling. You’re having fun chatting with someone when all of a sudden they ask the question and you’re not sure if you should laugh or run away.

Don't be Mr Rude!
Don’t be Mr Rude!

Everyone has different annoyances but the following 5 are rude to ask anyone.

5. Are you seeing anyone?

Why is this rude?

Our society seems obsessed with coupling and producing 2.5 offspring but that’s not for everyone. Yes everyone enjoys a good love story but if the person is single they’re already seeing lovey-dovey couples everywhere and you rubbing it in their face that they’re single, is just mean.

What to say instead

Ask what they’ve done recently that excites them or what their passionate about.

4. Have you lost/gained weight?

Why is this rude?

Nobody likes to be reminded that they are or were fat. It’s not fun. Not to mention the rats-nest of psychological issues associated with weight and looks. Our society praises muscled, or rake-thin, men and curvy thin, or model thin, women. When nearly every person you respect on television or movies looks like something you’re not it’s easy to start thinking there’s something wrong with you.

What to say instead?

If you have to comment on their appearance try saying something positive about their clothes, makeup, hair, facial hair, or accessories. These are things people can easily control and some people put a lot of care into them.

3. Where are you “really” from?

Why is this rude?

You’re assuming that the person doesn’t look like you so they can’t be from the same place as you. If someone says they’re from Ottawa, leave it at that. Many people who don’t look like you are from here, same as their parents, and grandparents.

Yes I have been asked this despite being white. People seem to think I must be from Iceland or a Scandinavian country. It’s funny to see their faces when I say both sides of my family have been here for upwards of 8 generations and came from France.

What to say instead?

Nothing. If the topic of race/ethnicity/origin comes up than you can politely inquire about their background. You’ll find most people are more than willing to talk about it in context when they aren’t being assaulted with the question.

2. Why are you into all this kid’s stuff?

Why is this rude?

First you’re assuming what I like is only for kids and second you’re assuming that matters. I love animated movies (Inside Out is my favourite movie of 2015), My Little Pony, science-fiction, fantasy, YA literature, etc. By saying they’re “Only for Kids” you’re judging my likes and the things I like at the same time. Not cool!

What to say instead?

What’s [insert thing] about? What do you like about it? Asking questions as if you respect my opinion instead of having already judged my tastes.

1. Is your partner pregnant yet?

Why is this rude?

Again society seems obsessed with the idea of coupling off and making those 2.5 offspring. Not everyone wants children, not everyone is read to have children, and not everyone can have children. Assuming that they MUST be popping out tiny little clones is annoying.

It’s worse for those who can’t have children but want them. Then they are reminded every single time of what they can’t have.

Personally I’m not ready yet and that’s me and wife’s choice. When we finally do have children be prepared to hear about it. A LOT!

What to say instead?

Personally I like to ask newlyweds and people who’ve lived together how tired they are of hearing this question. It’ll usually get a laugh.

Otherwise, just don’t ask. You’ll know when they are ready to tell you.

 

What rude question do you hate the most?

Éric