Hello My Imaginary Friends,
I don’t often do Throwback Thursday, not because I dislike the concept, but because I’m not always as proud of my old writing as I am my new.
Facebook reminded me today of my idea for a Buffy the Vampire Slayer reboot. About eight years ago they were considering rebooting it as a new movie. It was a terrible idea to do without Joss Whedon and it died quietly.
2017 Éric’s commentary in italic and bold.
Buffy Summers: Molly C. Quinn from Castle. She’s a little young but has the acting chops to pull it off. (She’s still in her mid twenties and I think she could do it. Alternate casting being Zendaya.)
Joyce Summers: Amy Adams as the Ju-jitsu instructor/ Anthropologist mother. She normally doesn’t play action roles but would be great with Quinn and could definitely train for it. (I’d still love to see Amy Adams in an action role, but it would also be cool to see Sarah Michelle Geller.)
Watcher: Gerard Butler as a non-action geeky “Supernatural” nerd type of watcher. (I think I’d rather see Idris Alba or Jason Momoa in this role)
Villain: Gary Oldman as a brutal and intelligent vampire. (This is still a good choice but I’d also like Tom Hiddleston or Peter Capaldi)
Comic Relief: Andy Serkis and Paul Bettany as over-educated fast talking vampires. (Replace Serkis with Fran Kranz)
There would have to be several story lines running through the movie that hasn’t been done before in Buffy history. Within each of the story lines there would be several mini stories.
Main 1: Buffy discovers her powers and as a preppy cheerleader is unprepared for them and is thrust into a dangerous situation. I’d avoid a lot of the high school stuff after she discovers her powers and concentrate on her strained relationship with her mom as she teaches Buffy how to fight. (This could work but there would have to be a few scenes of high school as her way to rebel against her Mom and everything happening.)
Main 2: Villain is trying to kill the slayer. He became a vampire to save his daughter from some disease having to turn her into one too but it didn’t help. He’s been trying to find a cure for her disease. Finds some old book that says the still beating heart of a Slayer cures anything in vampires. (I’d completely forgotten about this. I like it as a motivation. Make sure to show the villain as vicious but also as a loving father.)
Love: In a twist, the love story wouldn’t involve Buffy but her mom and the watcher. Reverse damsel in distress scenario. (Still love the idea of the awkward romance and Buffy’s sarcastic comments about it. In the rebellion stage there could be a nice fake out where Buffy is dating someone that the audience thinks is a vampire but turns out he’s just a jerk.)
Comics: Having most of their clan wiped out by the Villain, our comic reliefs decide to try and help him by catching Buffy but continuously fail. I want to make clear these “clowns” are going to be more of a cheesy/witty comedy that will lend itself to a darker story. (It should be mentioned that they are the last of their clan/nest of vampires. Randomly have them break into bad Shakespeare speeches.)
I think it would be very important to set the scene with a dark and dirty backdrop in a large city alley where a “traditional” slayer is kicking vampire ass hand to hand. Her watcher looms in the background and as he watches her, a shadow comes behind him and slits his neck.
She wins the fight and slays her last foe when she gets shot in the head by a vamp sniper on the roof. The bullet goes through her head and into a propane or natural gas tank, (which explodes). The shadow screams in anger and literally runs up the building towards the sniper, kills the vampire and howls into the night.
Then we go to a cheer practice where Buffy is basically teaching the choreography and doing some things that surprise even her. This is interspersed with scenes of her mom teaching an advanced weapons Jujitsu class. Early in the sequence you see a man hiding in the shadows watching Buffy and at the end you see the same man walk up the Joyce and try to stutteringly tell her about Buffy. She of course ignores it and promptly forgets.
Then we’d go to the mother picking up Buffy and them arguing. Something should slip about the Dad being dead (3-4 years.) I really want you to get the feeling that they are all each other have.
Etc etc. (Holy blood sucking vampires… who wrote this? I love it!)
Ok, Hollywood. I’ll help develop this if I get producer credits and choose my own script-doctor (one guess who that would be.)
Barring a big picture deal I may adapt this into a novel… Hmm…
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