Pandemic Satire

The world we know ended quickly but it started with signs. Small innocuous little reminders on how to wash our hands, to push a door with our foot, cough in our shoulder, or that shaking hands kills plans. One day they just started to appear with a little logo saying Pandemic Planning and Preparedness meant to make everyone feel safe with alliteration.

It worked too, the world stood at a level 6 pandemic for almost a month before the riots. It would have gone higher but they had neglected to add a level for, “Oh god, Oh god, we’re all going to die.”

Those who survived the longest avoided human contact and hid in their houses, The internet was buzzing with Tweets, Texts, Mails, Walls, Posts, and all kinds of other things till one day it just went silent. No one had anything left to say we all knew it was the end of our world. Not our planet, she would shrug us off like fleas and in a hundred thousand years all traces of us would be gone except maybe shopping bags, those would last a long time.

In the last days of human civilisation those of us who were still alive and hadn’t been driven insane tried to rebuild. We tried to make a better life; we used renewable resources, recycled, and even managed to live for years after the flu. Sadly it left us sterile and this capsule is the last of what we and our race could accomplish.

Along with this narrative you’ll find the plans for our wind turbines, water purifiers, and basic agriculture. If there is human life on this planet somewhere that has been able to survive and you find this I hope you learn from our mistakes.

Now let me tell you about the last days of the twenty second century and what happened to a misguided but great civilisation…

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