The Masks

Hello Family, Friends, and Fans;

Let’s talk about The Masks… no, not that one…

Jim Carrey in The Mask

What’s a Mask?

A person masks when they don’t feel safe or comfortable being themselves. It’s a persona that you put on that isn’t quite you.

Queer Mask

Nathan Lane and Robin Williams in The Birdcage.

I grew up in a small town at the end of the twentieth century and any form of Queer was frowned upon. Gay was not something people were allowed to be. It was a schoolyard insult along with all it’s pejoratives. The few examples of bisexuality I saw in media were quickly erased (Willow from Buffy) or just there to titillate (Mirror Universe DS9).

That means as a teen I wore a mask of “straight male”; even if I didn’t fully understand who I was, I knew I wasn’t allowed to mention how cute Brendan Fraser was, wear too bright colours, stand with my hip out, walk with too much hip movement, like romantic comedies, or a million other things that would make people call me gay.

Despite having a very supportive family and an aunt who was gay, the society at the time was oppressive.

I’m still working on dropping this mask and I’ve mostly managed to shrug it off, but I still fall back on it when meeting new people. A lot of people, especially in the 2SLGBTQIA+ community still have prejudices against bisexuals.

Neurodivergent Mask

Hugh Laurie in House.

I’m still learning about neurodivergent masking but think of it like trying your best to not freak people out but those same people never tell you what freaks them out. Instead, you learn by people avoiding you, telling you you’re annoying, making fun of you, calling you names that trivialize mental health, call you a know-it-all, or nerd.

My natural expression is mostly neutral and I was teased for it by kids and teachers in grade school. In high school, I decided that I would show my emotions outwardly more. At first it was exhausting but after a few years it became second nature. Now when I’m with friends I still fall back into the, what feels like, over exaggerated part of me.

It’s just one thing that I have trained myself to do to avoid conflict or trouble. No one mistakes you for serious when you say sarcastic things in an exaggerated voice.

As much as I’ve masked in this way, I’m not great at keeping my infodumping or chattiness in check, to the point that I’ve had co-workers and bosses laugh about it. Because of autism, I’m never sure if they’re laughing at me or just laughing, and the Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria tells me it’s always laughing at me.

Geek Mask

Jaleel White and Kellie Shanygne Williams in Family Matters.

Most likely tied to the other two is my nerdy/geeky side. I’m the absolute worst at hiding this but in grade school I was mocked incessantly for liking things. Seriously strange that our society likes to mock people for liking things. I had a Jurassic Park sweater that I would have worn until it died if I hadn’t been shamed into never wearing it.

Most new people, unless I’m at a geeky event, won’t hear about my geeky side. Not until they bring something up that triggers a mini rant or discussion.

It’s the mask that has never been worn with family and rarely with close friends. I will nerd out about all kinds of things.

What it means to unmask

Robert Downey Junior as Doctor Doom

Unmasking is the idea of being yourself and doing what makes you feel comfortable rather than what makes others comfortable. I’ve been trying my best to do this at home and be myself completely but there are still things that I have trouble letting myself be.

It’s also really exhausting to constantly analyze who’s safe, who isn’t, and about what. Some are okay with Bi people but think D&D is weird, others are fine with board games but think getting easily distracted is a personal weakness. When I say social interactions are exhausting, that’s what I mean. It’s hard hiding.

I know I’m privileged and safer than most, but that doesn’t change my experiences and traumas around who I am and how I hide it.

That’s what I mean when I talk about masking.

Stay safe and be kind,

Éric

Geek Charming – JenEric Movie Review

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Hello Cinephiles,

Today we’re talking about the 2011 film Geek Charming.

Story

It’s a teen rom-com where the popular kid has to work with the nerd and they fall in love. I did like the gender-swapped makeover scene.

Score: 0.5

Characters

The female lead almost seems like she’s a bad actress to start with but it turns out that it’s the character who’s a bad actress and she’s nowhere near as shallow or vapid as she seems. This is a hard transition to pull off without seeming fake and the movie did a great job.

The male lead became more accepting and confidant but didn’t have much more development than that.

Score: 0.5

Dialogue

Sometimes I forget what the 2010’s was like, but this is filled with dated slang and quippy one-liners.

When the movie decides to be serious, it does a great job in those softer moments. Bonus points for explaining relativity in one breath.

Score: 1

Visuals and Music

The camera work was very early 2000’s Disney channel. The clothes, sets, and everything else were okay but low budget.

The music was acceptable but nothing special.

Score: 0.5

Fun

I get irritated watching the characters flinging their cameras while filming and I found the idea that a film club would be all sci-fi a little unlikely. Film nerds tend to look down on the genre.

That being said, the actors did a great job and it was cute. I really liked that this movie showed the world what made him fall in love with her. It was a nice touch and made everything more believable.

Bonus point for having the poor kid showing the rich man Metropolis, a film about the class divide between workers and wealthy land owners.

Score: 1

Overall

A product of its time, it celebrates nerds and love with lots of innocent heart. The actors do a great job with a predictable script.

Final Score: 3.5 Stars out of 5

Come see us at Virtual NerdCon

Hello Coffee and Crochet Lovers!

Tomorrow from 10am – 5pm est, we will be participating in Virtual NerdCon.

Virtual Nerdcon is a nerdy convention hosted in an ACTUAL virtual world! You can customize your avatar, make friends, and shop from actual booths! It has all of your favourite nerdy hobbies and interests for you to shop from AND you can support small businesses! Best part is, you technically don’t even have to get out of bed!

Date: July 10th
Time: 10am – 5pm EST
Price: $1 CAD/ticket

Get Tickets Now

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All proceeds from ticket sales are going to helping Native Women in the community through the charity Native Womens Wilderness.

Native Women’s Wilderness was created to bring Native women together to share our stories, support each other, and learn from one another as we endeavor to explore and celebrate the wilderness and our native lands.

https://www.nativewomenswilderness.org/

Hope to see you there!

Virtual NerdCon Buck-A-Thon!

Hello Con Deprived People,

We’re going to be doing Virtual NerdCon again. It’s an online convention in a 3D game-like environment. Lots of fun and really cool.

This time it’s July 10th and all ticket sales go towards helping Native Women in the community through the charity Native Womens Wilderness.

Virtual Nerdcon is a nerdy convention hosted in an ACTUAL virtual world! You can customize your avatar, make friends, and shop from actual booths! It has all of your favourite nerdy hobbies and interests for you to shop from AND you can support small businesses! Best part is, you technically don’t even have to get out of bed!

Date: July 10th
Time: 10am – 5pm EST
Price: $1 CAD/ticket

Get Tickets Now

Thank you and Stay Safe.

Éric

What I Learned Not Having a Phone for 8 Days

Hello My Imaginary Friends,

We recently went on a vacation to Paris. After looking into the roaming plans and their cost, we decided to leave our phones at home for the vacation.

I knew it would bug me, but I had no idea how or how I’d react.

A little background before we begin. I haven’t been without a cellphone since 2002. In high school, I was the dork with the digital organizer. I had an HTC-Dream in 2009 and remember Android 1.6 Cupcake. All that tells you I’m a little of a gadget nerd and haven’t been far from the convenience in almost a decade.

One of the first pictures I took and posted directly from my HTC-Dream to Facebook in October 2009. (604×402 pixels in size)

Like most people my age, I rarely make phone calls with my phone. Only when I have to or if I want to speak with my older relatives.

What I didn’t miss

I expected to miss the constant social connection of my phone, but it’s the part I missed the least. It was actually kind of nice to disconnect and ignore things that weren’t important.

I’m a little bit of a digital hoarder. Take for exemple that before this trip I had a mailing list subscription to TeeFury in 3 of my 5 emails.

The vacation and only being able to clean out my facebook and email once a day, sometimes less, gave me the push I needed to start cleaning out subscriptions, groups, and even a few friends.

What I have now is a quarter the amount of incoming emails and a lot less of an urge to check my phone every four seconds.

What I did miss but was glad I didn’t have

The camera on my phone is exceptional and I have a nasty habit of relying on it too much. I have a fantastic Mirrorless SLR and need to use it more often. No matter how good your phone’s camera is, at the moment, an SLR will be much better.

This forced me to reach into my bag and grab the camera instead of just pulling out my phone.

What I missed

Being able to search for random information, directions, locations, and even identify landmarks; was something I truly missed about my phone.

The ability to pull out my phone and be told what a landmark is and its history is extremely useful. Being able to ask where to find the closest café is extremely useful. Being able to find out the hours of operations for business over a holiday is useful.

I have terrible handwriting so being able to write a list for groceries on my phone is something that I love. The list is shared with my wife so if she forgets something while I’m out, she can add it to the list no problem.

Despite being French Canadian, there was a language barrier and some words I had no idea what they meant. It would have been nice to have a universal translator in my pocket for shopping.

We went to Paris with my in-laws and being able to separate without detailed plans of where and when to meet is something I greatly missed.

I also missed being able to listen to music, read, play games, and jot down ideas.

 

I still think that the roaming is excessively expensive, but I sure missed the convenience of having my phone.

Éric