Top 5 Things I Never Thought I’d say – Public Servant Edition

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Hello My Imaginary Friends,

I received my certificate for being in the public service for 10 years (only 20 more to go. Woo!)

I have seen a lot and said a lot in that time. Countless amounts of, “Huh?” and “Why?” but some things have really blindsided me.

 

5. Do we still have pens/highlighters?

A few years ago the government released a directive to lower the amount of paper we use. I never liked printing things anyway and most of my work is digital but every once in a while I need a pen and can’t find it.

There’s a little area that has some, but nothing compared to the stationary closets of the past.

4. Template, form, mock-up, or style?

Surprisingly depending on people’s background, all these things can mean the same product. It can be:

  • an example file used to recreate the same look
  • a fillable document meant to collect information
  • a technical product that has all the styles and look built into it for easy formatting
  • a list of detailed instructions or examples that show how something should be done.

It’s not always obvious what people want and trying to navigate that without sounding condescending is a pain.

3. Free food? I’ll pass.

I love free food, like a starving college/university student loves free food.

There are a lot of events that are held where they give free food. I’m still learning which ones are worth it and which are, “standing in line for an hour in the hot sun wishing I was dead”.

Some of these events are just not worth the burger and bag of chips that’s offered.

2. My Agency has an Instagram strategy…

It was bound to happen. I’m so old and out of touch with social media and tech that my agency is outpacing me. They are looking into Instagram as a way to spread the accomplishments of the public service.

That means that it’s possible that my workplace will have an Instagram account before me.

It both makes me want to sign up and not want to… yikes.

1. You’ve reached a government phone… stop calling me

Three years ago my office got rid of landlines in favour of cellphones. That, unfortunately, meant the death of extensions and government specific numbers. Which meant the rise of spam calls.

Since I don’t deal with clients directly I get very few, real, calls.

The fake CRA scam, duct cleaning, credit card scam, Chinese Embassy, and people looking for Genevieve call me on a regular basis.

My favourite thing to do is answer the phone with my name, position, and agency and then repeat it twice. Most of them hang up or laugh and then threaten me.

 

What odd things have you said in your day job?

Éric

It – Canadian film locations

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As I was looking for something to write about this week, I decided to type “new film locations” into Google and see what popped up. And, well, this was kinda interesting.

The movie ‘It’ premiered in 2017, and although it is set in Derry, Maine (based off of Bangor, Maine), filming did not take place there. Instead, they filmed in Toronto’s Riverdale area (mostly at the Cranfield House at 450 Pape Ave), and Oshawa and Port Hope for exterior shots.

The film crew setting up a location in Port Hope. Image from inquisitr.com.
The facade of the house. Built in Oshawa. Torn down after filming ended. Image from onset-hollywood.com.

I can’t imagine how I would feel walking around in the same locations as a horror movie…and I have friends in that area!

However, if YOU are interested in following in Pennywise’s footsteps, here are the filming locations: ‘It’ filming locations

Are you interested in touring Ontario? Jen has retired from working as a travel agent. Hope you’ve enjoyed Fandom Travel . 

Why We Don’t Offer Brewed Coffee

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Hello My Imaginary Friends and Coffee Lovers,

I’ve been asked a lot by people why we don’t offer brewed coffee for sale. Recently, an event we applied to rejected us because we wouldn’t sell brewed coffee.

On the surface there doesn’t seem to be a big difference between selling coffee beans and selling coffee. Because of that, we often get people asking us why we don’t sell brewed coffee. The short answer is that it’s a completely different business and we don’t have the money, time, or roasting output to invest into it. The long answer breaks down into 3 parts; Equipment, Permits, and Roasting Output.

Equipment and extras

Here’s a basic list of equipment we’d need to do it properly:

  • Grinders (We’d need to pre-grind all our beans, so we’d need something that can do large loads and is easily cleaned to avoid allergic reactions.)
  • Brewers (At least 2 large-scale airpot drip brewers. That way we can brew directly into large pots and not burn each other with glass diner pots.)
  • Airtight Storage for the ground beans (In order to prepare we’d need to have something that can store the grinds without losing their quality)
  • Cups, lids, and stuff for coffee (Even at one size, it’s quite the investment to get enough of everything and always best to overbuy rather than run out)
  • Booth set up and organization (We need everything to store dairy products in bulk safely. Then then we need a place for people to prepare their coffee, a place to roast, and a place to vend.)

All that goes with making sure we have electricity, cleaning supplies, water, and enough of everything to get through the day.

Permits

The required permits for sealed coffee beans are minimal. Selling them doesn’t require to much paperwork. Meanwhile, selling prepared food requires permits, permission from the venue, inspection of the product, equipment, and location.

That’s a lot more work and expense. Especially for a 2 or 3 day convention.

Roasting output

This is a big one. It takes me roughly an hour for every 2.5 pounds of coffee. That’s a lot of work. I normally take roughly 4-6 days of 12-14 hours to prepare for Ottawa Comiccon. A large bag (1/2 lbs) should make roughly 12 large (16-18oz) cups of coffee. I’ve estimated that at Ottawa Comiccon we would on the low end sell 300 cups a day high end 1000+.

This would roughly double the roasting I need to do (I would be running on the “expect the worst but plan for the best”) unless I completely dropped selling beans. Which would be a stupid decision seeing as it’s a great seller.

Conclusion

Coffee is our passion and we love it. I would love to buy a coffee cart and spend a whole lot of time at festivals and conventions selling brewed coffee. However, that’s not my business. You wouldn’t ask a milk farmer why he doesn’t sell cakes or a writer why they don’t sell paper. Right?

It comes down to resources. I’d rather concentrate our money on perfecting the beans and the roasting rather than branching out.

 

Thank you for reading,

Éric

Take Two – Recommendation Thursday

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Hello My Imaginary Friends,

I love mystery books, movies, and television shows. I also enjoy a good old procedural. Recently a network show came across my radar that I hadn’t heard about. Take Two is a buddy cop show by  Andrew W. Marlowe and Terri Edda Miller, the former creator and executive producer of Castle respectively.

This show owes a lot to Castle and doesn’t even try to hide it, including hiring some of the cast.

If you liked Castle for it’s wittiness and the fact that it never took itself seriously, you’ll love this show. If you liked it because of the charisma of Nathan Fillion, you’ll get almost as much spread between the cast.

I’m enjoying the fact that this show revels in taking its mysteries into weird and unexpected directions.

Have a look at one of my favourite episodes so far:

 

What do you think? Will this fill the Castle-sized shape in your heart?

Éric

Blush: Toys

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I have to say, I’m thrilled that people are using our anonymous question box! Keep the questions coming!

Question

I was cleaning out my room the other day, and found a dildo in the back of my drawer under a pile of papers. It was sticky! I’m sure I washed it properly before I put it away, bc I always do that, but it was so long ago I don’t actually remember. What happened, and can I expect my others to do the same?

Answer

There is no indication of the material of the sex toy, but I can guess that it was either jelly rubber or plastic. Those are the cheapest materials used to make toys, and although the question doesn’t indicate the cost of the toy, the cheaper ones degrade over time, no matter how carefully you take care of them.

Image from howtocleanstuff.net

An example of cheap plastic:
When we bought our house four years ago (four? already?) my mother gave me several boxes of my old toys, including my Barbies. Several of these Barbies had to be thrown out due to discolouration or sticky plastic. I was really upset, but didn’t know what had happened until I started researching for this question.

Some Barbies (including one or two of mine, apparently) used to be made with cheap plastic. This plastic has now been banned for use in household items and children’s toys, but not in adult novelty items like sex toys.

How do sex toys slip through a ban like that?

Legal jargon.

Because they are not specifically mentioned, and are considered “novelty items”, there is a legal loophole. So consumers have to be careful when buying products. They should double check the materials and be sure to buy from reputable companies.

There are two criteria that must be carefully considered when buying a sex toy: the chemical composition and porosity of the material.

Lots of plastics are made with phthalates, and these are what has been banned in children’s toys. But phthalates interact very poorly (or well, depending on how you look at it) with mucous membranes, such as the one in a vagina, and can cause itchiness and chemical burns. Yikes!

Porosity is the measure of void spaces in a material. The more porous something is, the more likely the material is to harbour bacteria. Even if you wash a toy with soap and water, a very porous material will never be completely free of bacteria. If you own a porous toy, I recommend using a condom over the toy to prevent any problems. If you’re considering buying a porous toy, don’t.

The recommended material for sex toys is silicone (and you can use water or oil based lube with silicone toys), because it can come in a variety of densities (flexibility), is not made with phthalates and is completely non-porous. A good (update June 2021: this company has racist beliefs) company to buy from is Bad Dragon. (Caution, do not click this link if you are not prepared to see dildos of many shapes and sizes)

So to get back to your question, what probably happened was degradation of a phthalate-ridden porous material. It will happen to your other toys of similar quality and make. When it comes to sex toys, quality is definitely better than quantity, and you definitely get what you pay for.

References

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/removingthefigleaf/2016/03/toxic-toys-and-an-unregulated-industry/

https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/sex-toys/buyers-guide/sex-toy-materials-phthalates-rubber-silicone/

If you’re enjoying the Blush blogs, consider learning more with Blush: The Card Game from Renaissance Press.

Is it autumn yet?

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Hello My Imaginary Friends,

I have a secret to tell you… Come closer… Closer… Ok that’s good… I HATE HEAT!!!

This past month has been torture for me. Like alternating between a sauna and an oven. As much as walking in snow is a pain, it’s much more comfortable than walking in the rain. As much as I hate shoveling, I’d rather do that than mow the lawn (I’m literally allergic to mowing the lawn).

There’s only one thing that I like about summer and that’s when it’s not too hot… I love the cool evenings were it dips below 20 degrees Celsius. That I can stand, but this… arg.

Added onto that, Baby Dragon has been sick since mid month and I’ve caught the cold. For her it was a sore throat, cough, and fever. For me it’s a head cold. I feel like someone is trying to inflate a balloon inside my nasal cavities.

Being sick sucks. Being sick and overheating sucks X1000.

I should be writing, beta-reading, or writing, or editing… sigh.

Is is Autumn yet? I want hoodies, pumpkin pie, cool nights, and Halloween movies.

 

How’s your summer going?

Éric