stubborn

Dear Pegasus – Welcome to Level 5

by

Dear Pegasus,

You’ve had an impressive year. You’ve grown in every way and I’m really proud of the person you’re becoming.

This year you’ve:

  • Done homeschool with Mum
  • Taught yourself to read (What?)
  • Learned to use a mouse and computer
  • Learned how to add and subtract
  • Done a lot of baking and cooking
  • Played video games
  • Learned the rules for Battleship

You are all signed up for school in September and I’m just as nervous with you as I was with your sister. I worry about teasing and you having trouble with kids your age. You have had so little time to learn how to play with kids that aren’t Dragon. I’m sure you’ll be fine.

Your big sister loves you, she might fight with you, yell at you, and sometimes go out of her way to get on your nerves, but she loves you. She wanted to go into your class for the first few days to make sure you’re okay. I hope that level of mutual concern continues. I never had anyone like that in school and I’m glad you two will be together for 4 years.

Dragon is more concerned about teasing and fitting in, but I’m also worried about your language and dealing with a real classroom where you’re not the centre of attention.

Before that happens, there’s a whole summer to get through. We have a big trip planned and you’re excited to get on the first plane you remember.

Something really special that I’m going to miss next year is spending time with you during the day. You would randomly ask me to read you a book (or 12) and snuggle into me. We’d play phone games and you just snuggle close.

You climbing into my lap and putting your head against my chest and demanding we do something is soothing and wonderful. I’m going to miss that with you at school all day and me coming home late 3 days a week.

You are stubborn in ways I’ve never seen before and sometimes you do things just because your sister does, but you are a joy to be around and I love you dearly.

Welcome to Level 5 and all the new challenges it’ll bring.

I love you lots!

Papa

Dear Dragon – Consequences Suck

by

Dear Sweet Dragon,

You are a fantastic kid but you’ve inherited every stubborn molecule from all sides of the family.

Our biggest struggle with you right now is how much you love your brother. That doesn’t sound too bad, except for the fact that you never stop touching, pulling, holding, squishing, hugging, or loudly singing/roaring/screaming at him.

You still don’t know your strength and he can not tell you to stop. He will occasionally make noises of annoyance but he’s not consistent enough for you to listen… even if you were inclined to listen.

So our current largest battle is getting you to respect his bodily autonomy and ask before touching him. You need to ask us, since he’s too young to reply for himself. Unfortunately, you refuse to listen or forget to remember… not sure which.

Note: Compared to hitting him or any other kind of mischief you could get into, this isn’t terrible, but it is very frustrating.

So last night you harassed him to the point of him being upset and us having had enough. We told you to not touch him or you were going to bed. Less than a minute later you saw him drooling and whipped around, grabbed his burp-cloth and wiped his face. I thought you’d hit him when I saw his head fall back but mum says he must have been surprised because you’re always gentle.

Either way, your face registered an, “Oh shit” moment and then you pretended not to notice.

We sent you to bed. You were not pleased. You cried yourself to sleep once at 9:30, then at 11:30, then at 2:30, then at 9, and finally you woke up at 10 and cried yourself into puking. Your tummy hurt so much that food was hard to handle.

This is hard on you and I hope you’ve learned to listen and respect others’ bodily autonomy, but I’m not so sure. Time will tell.

Something you might not realize right now, or even when you read this;hers’ really hard on us too. We love you and you’re a wonderful human being. Punishing you is hard.

I love you so much,

Your tired Papa

*Addendum added 2019-10-13* Okay Dragon. I didn’t go into details because I didn’t think it was relevant.

Here’s what happened when you were sent to bed.

  1. You got changed into PJs.
  2. We took you to pee and have water.
  3. We tucked you in and explained why you were going to bed early.
  4. We told you we love you.
  5. We let you try to sleep once you stopped crying.
  6. When you called for us we went up and did 3, 4, and 5 again.

We never leave you alone to cry and we refuse to force you to stop. We’ll comfort you and snuggle you but it’s okay to cry. (even if your crying almost always leads to gagging or puking.)