Point Zero – Chapter 5


Prologue | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12


Chapter 5: What’s in a Name?

The supervillain coined Puppeteer continues to futilely attack the greater Toronto area. Each set of attacks escalating from previous, this week the mayor will present a key to the city to Electric Knight and their friends.

“Electric Knight and their friends? Oh come on, that’s what they’ll call us?” Mel was incensed. 

“Can you think of anything better?” I asked as we waited in full costume behind a makeshift curtain. 

“Four… fantas… Quartet of Quality? Wow this is hard.” Mel sighed as she pulled out her sketchbook and doodled little fairies that flew around us and the protest going on in the park. 

They were the usual sort that could be found all over the world. Protesting something about aliens. No one could get them to answer straight, they either feared, loved, or both our alien visitors. The aliens could go probe themselves for all I cared, but the protestestors were the same as usual… except for a man that I saw out of the corner of my eye. He had a thicker beard and was more tanned but those eyes… they looked just like Frank’s. A fairy flew by my head and the man was gone. I must have imagined it. Frank was dead. I felt his cold lifeless body.

The fairies were joined by tiny angels and it quickly devolved into something that would give the news station editors a really hard time blurring out. An assistant that looked awed and horrified gestured them towards the stage. As the mayor said nice things about them Mel asked, “Why are we the only two here?”

“Because if this isn’t a trap, it’s a perfect target.”

Mel nodded and started to look out over the crowd, squinting in the midday sun.

“And for your service in saving the fine citizens of Toronto. I award you, Electric Knight and friends, the key to the cit—”

The mayor was interrupted by a large quantity of RCMP officers in full riot gear. One of them screamed, “Electric Knight. You and your friends are under arrest for vigilantism, endangering the public, and extensive property damage. Come peacefully or we’ll have to use force.”

“What is the meaning of this? I was not informed. You have no jurisdiction here. Those aren’t federal crimes.” The Mayor was angry. The fury coming off of her scared me more than the hundred or so RCMP in front of me. 

“We need evac here…” Mel started but trailed off. Her jaw dropped before she said, “They’re not getting the civilians out of the way.”

“Where are they all coming from?” I asked not catching on to what Mel’s words meant. “They only have batons out. I’ve never seen RCMP with only batons. This is the Puppeteer!” I turned to the mayor. “Teleporter, get the mayor and her people to safety and then start on the crowd. Mel, we need to play along.”

As much as I wanted to just start beating up the puppets that looked like police, I didn’t want anyone to be hurt. Thankfully most people were running away or being taken by Jane.

“We’re coming, officer. Just please don’t hurt anyone.” 

I walked slowly with my hands up towards the puppets. I looked warely at the crowd of RCMP. Now that I was closer I could tell they were fake. All their faces looked the same and vaguely like Brendan Fraser. That made me think of Frank, he’d loved old movies from the turn of the millennium, especially comedies with Brendan Fraser. I think we watched Dudley Do-Right ten times in a row once. Although I spent more time watching Frank and wishing I could tell him my feelings.

“How far are you taking this?” whispered Mel.

“I’m tired of waiting for another attack. Let’s find out who’s behind all this,” I whispered back. Loudly towards the puppets, I said, “We can’t get the others.”

In a dull and lifeless imitation of Dudley Do-Right, one of the puppets replied, “That will have to do.”

We were directed towards a black limo and we were gently pushed into the back seat. “Be ready to pull us out if this goes sideways,” I said to Jane, through the coms. She swore at me and told me I was being irresponsible.

“That won’t be necessary, I just wanted to meet my adversaries.” The voice came from an old speaker on a table in the middle of the limo. It looked like something familiar. 

Charlie’s Angels? Now that’s retro,” Mel said. 

“Thank you. Enjoy the ride. It’ll be your last.” He burst into a theatrical evil laugh and then added as an afterthought, “Have a snack or a drink. Minibar is fully stocked.” And the speaker exploded in a little fireball that wasn’t big enough for us to feel the heat.

“Does this all feel very familiar?” I whispered to Mel.

“Yeah kinda. Why?”

“Who had a poster of Charlie’s Angels in his room?”

Mel’s eyes grew wide and she shook her head, “We saw him die. He can’t be.”

“I’m not so sure.”

The car slowed down and stopped. We were at a warehouse near the lake. Something that was so stereotypical that if I’d rolled my eyes I was worried of spraining something.

As the Dudleys marched us towards the warehouse I thought about how each of the puppets had made me think of Frank, I thought I’d seen him at the park, the Dudleys, and now Charlie’s Angels. It couldn’t be just a coincidence. Could it?

The warehouse was empty except for a large group of Dudleys and a man standing on a tall balcony, in the shadows where we couldn’t see. “You’ve been a thorn in my side for long enough. It’s time I introduce myself and then we can talk about a ceasefire or you can die. I heard several guns and something that sounded mechanical cock.

“The Thorns,” Mel said loudly. “That’s our name.”

“Not the time Animator.” I tried to keep the manic giggle from my voice. The situation was dire, I didn’t think I could stop that many bullets, and the man I loved might be back from the dead as a bad cartoon villain. It was so absurd it almost hurt.

The man walked out of the shadows and said, “I am the Puppeteer but you can call me… ”

Read Chapter 6


While you wait for the next chapter, check out the previous serial stories:

Tom Cavanagh

Tom was a delight to meet. Most of the people in line were there for him because of The Flash, but not us. (You can find him on Twitter here.)

We were there because he plays Santa in our favourite Christmas movie: Snow.

So we asked him if there was a chance of a third movie (because there’s already a sequel). He said that if there’s a good enough script, he’d do it. Nice.

The sign on the back of our daughter’s shirt has our business name, our table number, and Eric’s cell number, just in case she got away from us. She never ran away. What a great little 2.5 year old! 😀 (P.S. I was pregnant with Pegasus at the time of this picture. He’d arrive in a little over a month and a half from this day.)

Matching Mommy-and-me Captain Marvel shirts by Popsquatch Designs.

The Spy Next Door – JenEric Movie Review

How This Works – Read Other Reviews

Hello Cinephiles,

Today we’re talking about the 2010 movie The Spy Next Door.

Story

The story is cute. Sort of a Uncle Buck meets Jackie Chan. It was just as formulaic as you can expect from a “fighting guy takes care of kids” type of movie.

You don’t watch this for the story.

Score: 0

Characters

Nerdy boy, angsty teen, and cute little kid. They all did well and their was some surprising depth in the characters. Although I did get annoyed at how young the 4 year old acted and was frustrated by the old trope of the Hispanic character being the mole.

Score: 0.5

Dialogue

Overall it was stilted and awkward. Some of it made me cringe.

However Jackie Chan was both adorable and hilarious.

Score: 0.5

Visual and Music

The fighting was top notch, the rest was okay.

The music wasn’t great and sometimes jarring.

Score: 0.5

Fun

This movie had Jackie Chan signing a lullaby and using stunts to get kids ready for school. It had him beating up a future MacGyver. It had heart, humour, and great action.

Fun for everyone.

Score: 1

Overall

The movie isn’t great cinema but it is a lot of fun and if you’re looking for a cute action movie, or if your child is currently in a spy obsession, this a great choice.

Overall Score: 2.5 Stars

Éric’s Conspiracy Theory Theory

Hello Imaginary Friends,

The world is a scary place right now. Other than the virus that has killed over 350,000 people worldwide and left countless others with life-long side effects; there are other things going on.

Some countries have taken this worldwide emergency as a great time to trample over civil-rights. I’m talking about China, the Saudi state, and Russia. The lockdown is hurting people. Joblessness is hurting people.

And the world will be different when this whole thing is over. Whether it’s for better or worse is yet to be seen.

It’s completely understandable that people are scared. It’s that fear that has driven people to believe in the most ridiculous things.

Image of Benjamin Franklin and the quote, “Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead. “

I’ve stated before that human intellect is based on pattern recognition and that leads to a biasing effect. We want to see the patterns and we want to see that the world is organized and controlled, therefore controllable.

It’s hard for those most fearful to accept that the universe is random and sometimes bad things happen for no reason. It’s easier to believe that Bill Gates wants to GPS tag everyone so he created the virus than believe that poor conditions in animal markets might be to blame.

In these trying times, it’s important that we keep vigilant and listen to the experts. Read and watch with critical thought. Here’s some more advice from me four years ago.

Be Kind, Be Aware, and WASH YOUR HANDS!

Éric

I’m not Okay and that’s Okay

Hello My Imaginary Friends,

It’s been a hard few months.

Returning to work after Dragon was born saw me fall into depression. It was a combination of things and it was hard. The hardest part being that I felt like I’m lucky to have a wonderful wife that worked from home and could take care of our daughter, I had a good job, wonderful friends, and I had a great small business. I felt ungrateful and weak for being depressed.

I did what I thought was the right thing and threw myself headfirst into being the best at everything I was doing. Trying to distract myself and prove that I deserved my life. It worked but at a cost. I ran myself ragged and burned out a year and a half later.

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I realized that I was going to experience the same thing with Pegasus. I could feel it when I wrote about going back to work.

Then there was a Pandemic (sounds like a bad kids book or punk band). I expected working from home would be a little stressful but I didn’t expect it to be as stressful as going back to work. I can’t believe how similar I’m feeling about work as I did. (Only 19-24 more years before retirement.)

Again here I am feeling guilty for being depressed and anxious. I know I have it good. I can work from home and have a good job, great coworkers, I get to hang out with my kids and wife, I try to stay in contact with my friends (sorry), my small business is small enough that we can scale down without risking shutting down, and I have spent the past six years making this house as comfortable as humanly possible (introvert life!).

Yet I still get mini-panic attacks before leaving the house to go shopping. I mourn the probable loss of my daughter’s first year of kindergarten, I miss the comforts of in-person game night, conventions, going to the movies, and I’m terrified for my family and friends.

Yesterday I posted this:

The hardest part of depression (other than feeling utterly powerless) is the part before I realize what’s going on. Naming the feelings, somehow, lets me feel them and process them. I’m still going to have a rough year but I guess that’s kind of a world-wide problem right now.

Now why am I writing this? It’s not for sympathy or presents, it’s simply to let you know what I’m going through and that it’s okay.

If you’re going through something similar and things start seeming completely hopeless, please reach out to someone to talk (or text). You’re not a burden and it’s okay to not be okay.

Be well and wash your hands,

Éric

Spy Kids 3 and Spy Kids 4 – JenEric Movie Review

How This Works – Read Other Reviews

Hello Cinephiles,

Today we’re talking about the 2004 and 2011 movies Spy Kids 3: Game Over and Spy Kids 4-D: All the Time in the World.

I reviewed Spy Kids 1 and 2 in a previous post

Story

Spy Kids 3

Villain captured in a cyber prison turns that prison into a game in order to enslave kids minds and …? Spy organization sends kid spy into game to find his sister and shut the game down.

It has serious potential but there was so little story and what there was, was confusing, ableist, or just boring. I spent most of the movie shaking my head or yelling at the main character. The first two were all about family but this one barely makes a cameo out of everything.

Score: 0

Spy Kids 4

It took seven years for people to forget about the last one. This one brings in new kids, new parents, and a very updated OSS. The time manipulation was utterly unbelievable and made my head hurt.

The story did go back to it’s roots and become all about family. The cameos by the original kids was great.

Score: 0.5

Characters

Spy Kids 3

They really tried to make Juni the sensitive outsider here and it failed completely. He’s basically a bumbling idiot. While in the others he and his sister bumble together and solve the problem, in this one the villain is helping him win and his sister is only in a tiny part of the movie.

Stalone is fantastic at chewing the scenery but his character is confused, confusing, and barely above useful. And don’t get me started on the one girl character.

Score: 0

Spy Kids 4

The characters in this were much better and less insulting stereotypes. I like that the boy being hearing impaired doesn’t make him weak, I like that the mom kicks ass while pregnant, I like that the kids are smart again. That being said, they were all a little bland as characters.

Score: 0.5

Dialogue

Spy Kids 3

There’s a scene near the beginning where the main character is talking about family and another character says, “Everyone is family Juni.”

His reply is, “That doesn’t any sense.”

That’s the best description of this movie. Nonsensical drivel followed by insipid dialogue.

Score: 0

Spy Kids 4

It wasn’t great but it wasn’t terrible. There are a few good puns and a lot of clock or time jokes. It’s ok.

Score: 0.5

Visuals and Music

Spy Kids 3

I thought 2 had a lot of 3D gimmicks and stupidity. This one practically based the entire movie on it. It’s cheesy pseudo computer game graphics for the entire movie. It looked bad sixteen years ago and looks worse now. The music was better.

Score: 0.5

Spy Kids 4

It took a few movies but they finally moved back to the hyper-saturated cartoon look of the first one. The action well done and the scenery is great. The music wasn’t fantastic but it was pretty good.

Score: 0.5

Fun

Spy Kids 3

The beginning and the end are a lot of fun and the middle parts are interesting if non-nonsensical and dumb.

Score: 0.5

Spy Kids 4

This was my daughters favourite of the four. She said it’s cause there was a dog and a baby. I liked it because it was a fun kids action movie. It doesn’t hold up to the original, but it was ok.

Score: 1

Overall

Spy Kids 3

Taking out the sibling dynamic from this series was a mistake. This movie doesn’t live up to the first and frankly is one of the worst movies I’ve seeen. It’s not offensive (Except the honeypot, nerd bashing, and ableism) just boring.

Final Score: 1 Star

Spy Kids 4

This movie tried to recreate the whimsy and awesomeness of the first but doesn’t quite get there. It’s bogged down by fart jokes and 3D gags along with a premise that makes my head hurt if I think about it too hard.

Final Score: 3 Stars

Renaissance Virtual Conference Update

Hello My Book loving Friends,

A few weeks ago I told you all about Renaissance’s Virtual Conference. A few things have happened. It’s been moved to June 5-7 and it’s now open for people who want to attend the panels.

If you want to check out the panels you can look at them and register at the Website.

Don’t forget to come say hi in the vendors room.

There are some fantastic panels. I look forward to seeing you there.

Éric