2019 Book Rankings

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Hello My Imaginary Friends,

This year I read 21 books, one of which was mine.

If you like Fantasy and Adventure, try Everdome By Éric Desmarais

5 Stars

  1. That Ain’t Witchcraft (InCryptid, #8) By McGuire, Seanan
  2. Star-Crossed By Dee, Barbara
  3. Skylark By Carrière, S.M.
  4. The Measure of a Monster By McGuire, Seanan
  5. Justice Calling (The Twenty-Sided Sorceress, #1) By Bellet, Annie
  6. My Teacher Glows in the Dark (My Teacher Is an Alien, #3) By Coville, Bruce
  7. My Teacher Fried My Brains (My Teacher Is an Alien, #2) By Coville, Bruce

4 Stars

  1. The Unkindest Tide (October Daye, #13) By McGuire, Seanan
  2. The Red Trailer Mystery (Trixie Belden, #2) By Campbell, Julie
  3. The Secret of the Mansion By Campbell, Julie
  4. Midnight at Madame Leota’s (Tales from the Haunted Mansion #2) By Arcane, Amicus
  5. Voltron: Legendary Defender #3 (of 5) By Hedrick, Tim
  6. Hope is Swift By McGuire, Seanan
  7. An Adventurer’s Guide to Eberron By Bonner, Logan
  8. The Gatehouse Mystery (Trixie Belden #3) By Campbell, Julie
  9. Spider-Gwen: Ghost-Spider, Vol. 1: Spider-Geddon By McGuire, Seanan

3 Stars

  1. Pack of Lies (The Twenty-Sided Sorceress #3) By Bellet, Annie
  2. Murder of Crows (The Twenty-Sided Sorceress, #2) By Bellet, Annie

2 Stars

  1. Disney After Dark By Pearson, Ridley
  2. Strawberry Cream Cupcake & Murder (Dana Sweet #1) By Marie, Ann S.

What was your favourite book?

Éric

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker – JenEric Movie Review

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How This Works – Read Other Reviews

Hello Cinephiles,

Today we’re talking about the 2019 film Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker.

Warning Spoilers!

Story

This is marked as the end of the Skywalker Saga (AKA numbered Star Wars movies) and was meant to tie up the loose ends and stories of the old, new, and middle characters in the series.

Although the story was pretty coherent, it was meandering and often got marred down by awkward nostalgia. Treating things like the fallen death star or Luke’s old X-wing as near magical artifacts of nostalgia.

As much as this felt like a love letter to the old Star Wars, it also felt like a massive set up for the future of that universe. Introducing so many new elements into the last movie that some from previous movies faded into the background. (Poor Rose.)

Overall, it was hopeful, anyone can be redeemed, the force is with us, you aren’t your parents, etc etc. (What’s with American entertainment and the obsession with hereditary power and competence.)

It was fun, but overly self-indulgent in it’s own mythos. Also “Wonder-Force-Twins” ex-machina.

Score: 0.5

Characters

I’ll have to watch the whole trilogy again but I felt that the characters changed a lot between movies. Poe’s character seemed to have the least consistency between movies, but even Rey felt different.

The only completely consistent character was Kylo.

It was nice to see the old crew, but overall it was frustrating to see the inconsistencies.

I did love Leia though.

Score: 0.5

Dialogue

The dialogue was exactly what you’d expect from a post-Lucas Star Wars. Hammy but not to the point of cringe. Lots of throwbacks and the actors genuinely delivered emotion.

Nothing stood out as infinitely quotable and a lot of it was whiny.

Score: 0

Visuals and Music

This was Star Wars. Visuals and Music are essential the best parts. When the Star Wars theme starts playing during the opening exposition crawl, I get shivers.

This is genuinely beautiful. From lightsaber fights on a storm-wracked wreck, to jungle planets, and the Sith homeworld. It was wonderful to watch.

Score: 1

Fun

There was a part of the movie near the end where Rey has gone off on her own and the others are feeling helpless that I just got bored. From that part onward, it felt like the ending was both rushed story-wise and slow pacing-wise.

Score: 0.5

Conclusion

This was a Star Wars movie. It had all the Star Wars stuff, both good and bad. I can see why some people loved it. I can also see where some people hated it.

Final Score: 2.5 Stars

2019 Movie Rankings

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Hello Cinephiles,

This year was a pretty good year for movies. Some fantastic action offerings and absolutely amazing animated films.

I saw 22 movies and for the first time in a long time I didn’t see anything that I hated.

This is the fifth year that an animated film is my highest ranked and the second that it’s not a Disney movie.

This is the ranking of movies I saw in theatres (or rented) that were released in 2019. This doesn’t include Netflix originals, made for TV Movies, or straight to DVD releases.

These are ranked by how much I enjoyed them and not their quality as “Films”.

Absolutely Loved

  1. Abominable
  2. Frozen II
  3. Nancy Drew and the Hidden Staircase
  4. Captain Marvel
  5. Spider-Man: Far From Home
  6. Spies in Disguise
  7. Shazam!
  8. Men In Black: International
  9. Pokemon Detective Pikachu
  10. Happy Death Day 2U

It was good

  1. The Kid Who Would Be King
  2. Hobbs & Shaw
  3. Jumanji: The Next Level
  4. Charlie’s Angels
  5. Knives Out
  6. Aladdin (Live Action)

Meh

  1. The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part
  2. How To Train Your Dragon: Hidden World
  3. Dora and the Lost City of Gold
  4. Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker
  5. Avengers: Endgame
  6. Toy Story 4

Looks like 2020 will be eclectic and interesting.

What was your favourite movie this year?

Éric

Purging Books

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Hello My Imaginary Friends,

I LOVE books. The smell, the feel, the reading… If you’ve been to our house (Books End) you know we have an impressive library. You might be surprised to hear that every couple of years we go through it and purge our books.

Check out Rock Paper Cynic

As I get older and less wise, I’ve come to know my tastes a little better and there are books that I have no interest in reading. Books that I thought I would love but now just make me go, “do I have to?”. I can make four categories that I have no interest in reading anymore.

Classics

I’m not talking the old classics. I have a special place in my heart for Beowulf, The Three Musketeers, and other classical literature. (Although I have an illogical hate of epistolary style books.)

No I’m talking about the classics of genre that people will be shocked you haven’t read. Things that are classics because we grew up with them not because they are the greatest. Not that I judge anyone for loving these, but I’m not interested in another 7-13 book epic fantasy about a farmboy.

Power Triangles

These are often in romance, adventure, horror, or urban fantasy. There’s a main character and two others that are trying to control them. This can be villains, lovers, or sometimes both. It’s filled with cringe and drives me up the wall.

That means it takes a lot for me to read a vampire book and I shudder at the description of most werewolf books. Again they aren’t bad books, I just don’t have the mental energy.

Violent Horror

I like horror, and I like Stephen King, but there are some that I just can’t handle. Overly violent and crude horror makes my stomach turn and makes me want to stop reading. These can be fantastic literature that challenge your way of thinking but I don’t want to read it. I’ll probably never re-read A Clockwork Orange.

Pretentious Writing

Every once in a while someone tries to elevate a genre and writes about a vampire, or modern wizard, but with prose that’s so pretentious is passes purple and hits ultraviolet. If the first page is so long winded that I zone out… It’s not for me.

There can be beauty in this, but it has to be done in service to the writing not the authors ego.

So these books and those that I never plan on rereading are the ones we’re getting rid of. There’s only a couple dozen, which is nothing compared to the couple thousand we still have.

So what are you sick of reading?

Éric

Trolls – JenEric Movie Review

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How This Works – Read Other Reviews

Hello Cinephiles,

Today we’re talking about the 2016 movie Trolls.

Story

The basic concept for this movie is that the Trolls are being hunted as food by Bergens. The unreliable narrator tells us that it’s the only way the Bergens can experience happiness. This is a dark concept that had me extremely interested. It’s probably the best part of the movie.

The theme of happiness runs throughout the movie with the inevitable, “Happy was inside you the whole time,” ending.

The humour is fun when they go a little psychedelic, but mostly relies on fat jokes, fart jokes, and a super awkward romance.

The film’s message ends up falling flat in it’s complete disregard for diversity and blatant misunderstanding of depression and trauma.

Score: 0 (I can’t believe anyone sober could approve this script.)

Characters

Ripped straight from an 80’s high school drama, these characters manage to have less depth than the dolls they’re based off.

Sad geek/loner/weirdo pines for beautiful/vapid/popular girl. His entire journey is to realize it’s okay to be happy. He’s finally accepted when he changes colours and starts to sing, effectively conforming to the group.

The king Bergen and scullery maid love story is so shallow they need four separate romance tropes to prop it up.

Score: 0

Dialogue

Overall the dialogue is pretty bland. A lot of, “Be Happy,” and the music is mostly used as reinforcement of the themes.

Forgettable overall.

Score: 0

Visuals

The visuals are pretty decent, even though they looked ripped from Little Big Planet and Kirby. They’re used to great effect to show the contrast and texture of this horror world, where there’s always a bigger fish to summon.

Score: 0.5

Fun

At the ten minute mark after the 3rd fart joke, I started to get worried.

The movie was fun when it concentrated on the contrast between joy and horror, but mostly I found myself wishing I was watching the new Cats movie instead.

Score: 0.5

Conclusion

This movie is offensive, awkward, and downright boring. Save yourself the pain and watch something else.

Final Score: 1 Star

Serial Story 2020 – Point Zero

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Hello My Imaginary Friends,

You voted and were quite clear on what story should become this year’s serial story.

This year’s serial story will be Point Zero!

Point Zero

Setting: Our world after an alien attack that destroys several small towns before the aliens disappear.
Genre: Disaster, Post Apocalyptic, Super Hero

Follow Sam as they and their four best friends must deal with an alien attack that leaves the world irrevocably changed and the superpowers that it’s given them.

Every generation has a disaster that is etched into their memories. My grandparents had JFK, my parents had 9/11, and we had first contact.

It was a cool August night in my childhood hometown. It had a name at the time, something nature related that no one cares about; now it’s called Point Zero. It was a small town barely numbering in the four digits. I sat on the duck in the grade school playground, it sprung back and forwards every time I took a drink from the bottle of vodka in my hand.

Go Read the Rest of Point Zero

What is a Serial Story?

A serial story is a story that I write every month. I don’t plan ahead, I don’t have any idea how it’s going to end.

If I miss a month, you are rewarded with a bonus chapter. Yay!

It’s that simple.

I’ll have have Chapter 1 ready some time this month.

Thanks for voting and reading,

Éric

While you wait for the next chapter, check out the previous serial stories: