mental health

ADHD and Me

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Hello Friends, Family, and Fans;

Before the pandemic, I was talking to a friend and they said something like, “You understand what it’s like since you’re neurodivergent.” I didn’t know what that meant. In case you don’t, neurodivergent is a blanket term for those who have a different mental or neurological function. You’ll also hear neurospicy or other variations. The word is often claimed by autistics, those with ADHD, dyslexics, etc.

Once I looked up what they meant, I assumed it was due to my dyslexia, something that has plagued me my whole life.

Another friend later said they claimed Jen and I as part of their neurodivergent friends. I also started noticing a lot of my friends are neurodivergent and I started looking into it.

I started to see a lot of memes and videos about ADHD and Autism that were really relatable and I started wondering.

By the time the pandemic hit, I was thinking maybe. We’d also noticed some attributes in Dragon and started the process of getting her psycho-educational testing.

After a lot of procrastinating, Jen and I set up appointments for ourselves. (We’re still waiting on Jen’s results.)

Mine came back, as I expected, with ADHD of the Inattentive type. I’d done enough research to be fairly sure but it still feels weird. It makes sense however.

There it is, I’ve learnt more about myself and this gives me tools and a community to help me deal with my own brain. The nurse I talked to said that I’d done a good job finding strategies to help myself avoid the worst.

If you have questions I can try to answer but I’m no expert… yet.

Be kind and stay safe,

Éric

Random Updates from Éric

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Hello family, friends, and fans,

Some weeks are hard. This was one of those weeks. I’ve been working through a lot of emotions. Among them is the fact that I’m still in pain. I know that a new physio for two weeks isn’t going to fix everything, but I was secretly hoping.

Let’s break this down into categories:

Writing

I’m currently finishing the longest running project I’ve ever had (started in 2016) and I’m really hoping to be done by summer. It’s going slowly, mostly because of pain, and I worry it’s crap but at least I’m having fun writing it.

Family Life

I’m trying my best to be a good father and a good husband. I know that I haven’t always been perfect; I’m a little whiny and I over explain and analyze everything but I’m trying. This week I’ve felt like I’m not enough and that’s really frustrating.

Work

I have a similar issue at work. I think it’s time for me to find something new. I’m fairly certain that within a year, my position will be cut and after 15 years, it’s time to do something new. The problem with that is because of my health issues and lack of return to full time work, it’s not easy for me to convince anyone to hire me. So I feel a little trapped.

Health

I’m seeing a team consisting of a physiotherapist, kinesiologist, and occupational therapist. They are trying to help me get back to work.

While they’re doing that, I have an MRI for my head, neck, and back set up for mid July.

Dad

My father’s birthday was earlier this month. He passed away at the age of 47 from brain cancer.

He was 40 when he was diagnosed. Considering my health issues, it’s hard for me not to worry about this year. (I’m turning 40 in July.)

It’s one of the reasons I’m really glad that I got that MRI. At the very least we’ll know something. The MRI should be able to detect brain lesions from MS or brain tumours. Hopefully there’s nothing to find.

Mental Health

With all of the above I’m struggling, but my occupational therapist is helping me find coping mechanisms and to rationalize instead of spiralling. That part is helping and I’m trying to be kind to myself.

How have you been?

Be kind and stay safe,

Éric

Heat, Allergies, and Mental Health

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Hello My Imaginary Friends,

Everyone is different; our bodies react to weather, stress, and fatigue in different ways. So my experience isn’t the same as everyone else’s.

August sucks for me. Especially weeks like this week, where we had high temperatures and high pollen count. Despite living indoors with air conditioning, the heat and pollen still affect me. It means I can’t sleep very well (up every 20-30 minutes), can’t breath very well, and generally feel crappy.

I think the worse part of poor sleep, allergies, and feeling crappy; is that it makes everything seem worse and hopeless. This isn’t new, but I always forget. In the future, I should probably plan trips around this time to keep me moving and not thinking.

I crashed yesterday and snapped at my wife for something that wasn’t her fault (Sorry).

It’s a vicious cycle of feeling like I should be doing more and not having any energy to do it. So when I take time to rest or relax, I then feel guilty and that makes me feel depressed and anxious.

At least the kids are liking the weather. Here’s a cute picture of them playing on the splash mat in our backyard.

Once the heat breaks, I’ll start feeling a little better. Until then, I have to keep reminding myself that it’s okay to take time to recover and not to feel guilty about it.

Be kind to yourself!

Éric

AHHHH! I mean everything is okay…

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Hello Everyone,

Yesterday was a day that an exploitive company used a good cause to write itself a giant tax break and millions in free advertising. That’s all I’m going to say about that.

Mental health is something everyone struggles with. It’s something that is important to upkeep and it’s something that our society put WAY too much shame about.

Having mental health issues, short or long term, isn’t a weakness or a fault. It’s being human. It’s okay, you don’t have to do it alone.

I’ve had my troubles with depression, burnout, and anxiety. I understand the feelings of failure but you need to be kind to yourself and ask for help.

Ottawa Public Health says the following:

Mental health is an important part of our health. Positive mental health is the core for a person’s well-being. Good mental health allows a person to reach their potential and deal with normal stresses of life.

No matter our age, we all get stressed. Stress affects our mental health. Positive coping skills can help improve our mental health. Through positive coping skills a person can build resilience. Resilience allows a person to better handle the normal stresses of life and overcome challenging situations.

Do not feel ashamed of speaking to someone about mental health concerns and seeking help. It is important to seek help early.

It is important to speak to one another about mental health – this can help us increase dialogue, knowledge, and help-seeking, while reducing stigma. To learn more about how to talk about mental health, check out have THAT talk.

If you are concerned about your mental health or someone else, speak to your health care provider or check out the Mental Health and Substance Use Resource List. For information about mental health about your infant, child or youth, please visit our Parenting in Ottawa mental health page.

If you are in crisis, contact the Mental Health Crisis Line (24 hours a day/7 days a week) at 613-722-6914 or if outside Ottawa toll-free at 1-866-996-0991.

If you have a youth in crisis, contact the Youth Services 24/7 Crisis Line (24 hours a day/7 days a week) at 613-260-2360 of if outside Ottawa toll-free at 1-877-377-7775.

If you (or your child) are experiencing thoughts of suicide or harming yourself, call 9-1-1.

https://www.ottawapublichealth.ca/en/public-health-topics/mental-health.aspx

It’s a hard time of year and a hard year. Be kind to yourself and if you need help, reach out.

I love all of you.

Be safe and Be kind,

Éric

Blush: Reach Out

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Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all of you.

Today, I would like to share a few resources for mental health and crisis assistance. While that may seem like a depressing conversation for such a joyful holiday, I want to acknowledge that there are people who are struggling, and might be having a tougher time than usual because of it being a holiday.

All resources are geared towards Ottawa and Canada. If you need help, please don’t hesitate to either google your own city, or reach out to people who can help you.

Ottawa:
Distress Centre of Ottawa and Region (24/7 mental health assistance)
Midwifery Collective of Ottawa (Postpartum depression)
eMental Health (variety of crisis support lines)
Ottawa Public Health (mental health and substance use resource list)

Canada:
Government of Canada (mental health support lines)
Crisis Text Line (24/7 text support)
Canadian Mental Health Association (multiple programs and services)

Please know that you are not alone. There are people who care. Reach out to them.

If you’re enjoying the Blush blogs, consider learning more with Blush: The Card Game from Renaissance Press.

Parasomnia Cover Reveal and Pre-Order

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Hello My Imaginary Friends,

A lot of work goes into a book cover, especially if the author has input and is picky. This cover took a lot of work from the wonderful Caro at Renaissance Press and I think it looks great.

parasomnia ebook cover

At the Aux-Anges Institute, nestled in the woods outside of North Bay, they study and treat parasomnias, or sleep disorders. Ashley suffers from night terrors, Terrance sleepwalks, Kiri sleep-eats, and Paul sets fires; they are there for treatment. Adelaide took the job as a counselor to discover why she still has an imaginary friend.

When they discover the secret hideout of an old club called the Dreamers, they are shocked to find that the five of them are connected through more than just the Institute.

You can Pre-Order the book from Renaissance Press’s Website. 

The book will hopefully have a few early copies ready for Montreal’s Queer Between the Covers.

What do you think of the cover?

Later days,

Éric